update on the girls.

 well the girls are 15 months old now and i thought that i should write a little update about what they are doing.  

clara beth

19 lbs 13 oz (7th %)

29 in (10th %)

says mama, dada, hi, bye, hot dog and toodles (from mickey mouse!), ready go, please, nana, doggie, baba (what we call their pacifiers), and more.

signs please and all done.

has 11 teeth.

loves to read, dance, race with her brother, elmo and mickey, her cow blanket, cheese, strawberries, puzzles, and slides.

she likes to dress up, sing songs, tackle her sister to get what she wants, throws herself on the ground when she doesn't get her way, gives dozens of hugs a day, gives kisses, points to her ear, belly, mouth and nose.

she observes people and always keeps tabs on where her brother and sister are.  she wants to find them and then take what they are doing.

elise

18 lbs 3 oz (1st %)

29 in (10th %)

says mama, dada, hi, bye, hot dog and toodles (from mickey mouse!), bible, ball, doggie, baba (what we call their pacifiers) and done.
signs please and all done.
has 10 teeth.

loves to read, dance, elmo and mickey, her big pink blankets, avocado, bananas, climbing, and slides.
she likes to dress up, sing songs, throws herself on the ground when she doesn't get her way, gives dozens of hugs a day, gives kisses, points to her ear, belly, and nose.
she is my mischief maker and will always get into things, like cabinets, boxes and the toilet water.  she is my daredevil and does her own thing.  she is also a ham!
they are both following a few one step directions, love to play, want their mama around all the time, throw a fit when i won't let them visit daddy in his office during the day, stand up in their highchairs, love to play outside, love to go shopping and pull things into the cart, mimic cole, love to climb in daddy's lap to read the bible in the morning, refuse to wear bows in their hair and are obsessed with wearing their shoes.

 i love my little girls!  they are a little crazy at times but we can't imagine life without them!

mothers day.

we visited Brenner while he was on duty in Wichita Falls over Mother's Day weekend.  we had such a good weekend.  air force bases have tons of parks all over so we spent a lot of time playing.  we also ate out 4 times in 2 days, something that we never do because it is basically torture for us, but they did well 3 out of 4 times so overall it was a huge success.  we also discovered a cajun festival downtown and stopped by.  the best part was that you could pay 5 dollars to hold some baby alligators.  i got in line and we were the last ones to get in...and then cole wanted nothing to do with it.  i think he was scared to get in the little pool with yucky water and swimming reptiles....i can't imagine why.

needless to say, i took one for the team and got in with him while brenner tried to take pictures and wrangle the twins.  cole never actually held one and i could hardly get him to touch them.  i held those slimy things for 10 minutes.  elise, on the other hand, when given the chance, loved touching the alligator and was freaking out about trying to do what cole was doing.  my little animal lover!  although reptiles don't count as animals if you ask me.

the funny thing was, when we got out of the pool, cole started getting upset because he didn't want to stop holding the alligators.  then, all the way to dinner he kept telling us how much fun he had holding the alligators.  we kept reminding him that he never held the alligator and i had to force him to touch them but he insisted that he held them all by himself.  

whatevs, kid.  

i was in the brown, disgusting water holding those reptiles for you and don't you forget it. 

its all about making memories for your kids, right?

we had a great mother's day.  i was with my family and that is all that i wanted.  

there are no other kids that i would rather call my own and no other partner in parenting than brenner!

me and little bit.

i have been playing around with my camera and trying to get better at indoor lighting.  i got some sweet pictures with my little girl last weekend!

"no more picture mama, i'm warning you"

craziness.

i took this picture the day after the explostion in west a month ago.
be still my heart.

now, after more tragedy in oklahoma, i continue to thank god for our safety and another day with my babies.  i look at them, and my heart bursts with fullness as i am able to hold them another day, laugh with them and live our crazy campbell life together.
these events, these tragedies, they are heartbreaking.  truly.
and yet they serve as good reminders for us that this world is not our home.
we are not guaranteed another day, another minute.  we do not know what plans god has in store for us and while it may sound cliche, and we certainly forget to do it much of the time, we really do need to live in the moment.  that is all it takes for your lives to change and be turned upside down.
to lose your home, your family, your world.
and yet, this world is not everything.
yesterday i was reading in my john piper daily devotional, john 12:24-25.  truly, truly, i say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. whoever loves his life loses it ,and whoever hates his life in this works will keep it for eternal life.
basically, this world doesn't matter.  none of it.
it doesn't matter what people think of me, it doesn't matter what i wear.  it doesn't matter if i am famous.  it doesn't matter if i am the best mom.  i am to hate my life in this world and choose the cross.
that means choosing the cross over everything.
everything, people.
choosing christ over my stuff, my friends, my family.
it can be gone in an instant because i cannot comprehend god's perfect and complex plan for our lives.
but i know his plan is good and he has called me to be a part of it and that means holding onto the things he has given me loosely and holding tightly to him....and him only.
total commitment and trust in him alone.
 ---crickets---
anyone else have a hard time doing this?

i am learning to be thankful in every moment.
i am learning to trust god in the tragedies.
even when my heart breaks, i am learning about the goodness of his purpose and my need to never waiver in my faith of god's perfect plan.
i must die to my own plan, because god's plan has always been better.
not easier, better.
always. 
so now, i will go back to my kids' room and watch them sleep for a few moments.
i will be thankful for the food battle we had tonight with cole, thankful for the three outfits that clara went through today, thankful for the breakfast and dinner we had as a family, thankful for the short naps the girls took because they are teething, thankful for the two loads of laundry i still need to do and thankful that god gave me another day to live this wonderful life.
and i will pray that god molds my heart to be willing to put him above all of it.