One year.
I cannot believe that we made it.
From the moment that we found out that we were pregnant, our journey with the girls has been so full of trials, surprises, joy, heartache, drama and love.
From morning sickness that I thought would never end and that lasted 18 hours of the day, to the shock of twins, to the pain of almost losing them, to the overwhelming joy at their safe arrival, to sleepless nights, to baby snuggles, to 10 months of sleepless nights, to wearing and carrying a baby all day long, to early walking and first words and a full year of nursing twins, this journey has changed me.
This past year has been incredibly hard…..and incredibly rewarding.
There were days that I told Brenner I couldn’t do it anymore, it was too much. There were days where I felt like a failure because, well, I failed. I felt overwhelmed, stressed, frustrated, and tired.
But more often, I felt immeasurable joy and unending love.
And I prayed for this. I prayed for crying babies, difficult days of chaos with lots of kids running around. I prayed that the Lord would heal them.
I must say that as hard as it has been, I absolutely love having twins. I love these girls with my whole heart. They challenge me daily to be a better mom and to try to be a Godly role model. I want them to grow up and look up to me as a Godly woman, just as I have done with my own mom, and there is no greater challenge than to be an example of Christ for your children daily.
I have changed so much in the last year, in my perspective on life and evaluating what truly matters. I have had to let go of a lot of things that I wanted. Because let me tell ya, nothing teaches you about selflessness like being a parent.
My little darlings bless me every single day. They are happy babies who love to laugh at their brother, be tickled, play peekaboo, jump on the bed, read books, climb, clap their hands, dance to music, hug their baby dolls, race/chew on cars, give hugs and kisses, give big smiles and play in the bath. They still want to be held a lot, but having them start to walk early has been a blessing because i don't have to carry them all the time. They have both decided that it is extra fun to put their hands in their food after every meal and then rub their hands all in their hair.
Mom thinks that is super fun too.
Clara continues to be our observer who stays a little closer to my side. She is currently obsessed with books and brings them up to me to read and will hit me with them repeatedly until I sit down and read to her. She loves her baby dolls and pats them on the back as she carries them around. She is my picky eater but she weighs almost 2 pounds more than Elise!
Elise is my adventurer who loves to climb and get into all the cabinets and boxes and dump everything out. She was the first to crawl and walk. She squeals and stomps her feet when she wants me to pick her up and she knows how to sign 'more' and 'all done'. She also says two more words than Clara, hot dog (thank you once again, Mickey Mouse) and bye bye.
I cannot express the gratitude in my heart to God for giving these girls to me. Their lives are an everyday reminder of God's grace and love.
According to the doctors, these babies should not be here.
According to my God, anything is possible.
Happy Birthday my darling girls!
Elise.
Clara Beth.
